Why Snape's Such A Cranky Git
by Kakashis-Rabid-Fangirl
Summary: Why is Severus so cranky all the time? Read and find out a little about his past... Rated because of violence and some sexual reference in later chapters (possibly, dunno, haven't written the later chapters yet).
1. Home Is Where The Hate Is

A Child Named Severus  
  
Written by myself, dear Padfootz_Princess, previously known as Hikari_No_Yami  
  
This is a lovely little story about Snape as a child and why it is that he's a cranky old prat.  
  
********************* Chapter One- Solitude is a Child's Best Friend. *********************  
  
He sat outside beneath a great oak in the backyard, a book open in front of him, long hooked nose buried in it.  
  
He tried to block out the memories of just a few hours before with information on Hinkeypunks and Grindylows. He always did enjoy Defence Against the Dark Arts.  
  
***** Flash Back *****  
  
"YOU ARE NOT GOING OUT TONIGHT!" screeched a horse-voiced, greasy-haired woman with watery blue eyes, "Never again Severus, NEVER AGAIN!"  
  
"I'll go out whenever I please Samantha, and you cannot stop me." Came the oddly calm reply.  
  
Calm, but the boy sitting in the corner, biting down on his lower lip until it bled freely over his robes and carpet, could see past the calm facade. He could see his father's anger clearly in his ebony eyes.  
  
The woman broke out into sobbing fits and tears streamed down her white face. She fell to her knees and the boy heard the woman begging.  
  
"Oh Severus, please... You have a family... What about your son? What about your daughter?!" Samantha sobbed loudly.  
  
"It's not my fault Samantha, you pushed me away... You can't cling to someone." He said, still calmly and turning coldly away from the crying woman.  
  
The boy in the corner was whimpering now, his head was light, and still he bit down on his lip. He was holding in the tears and the screams just barely.  
  
"SEVERUS ANDREW SNAPE JUNIOR! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" came the horse screech once more, and the boy jumped, falling down on his rump and holding his knees tightly to his chest. He was crying now, and his voice came out a quavering whimper.  
  
"Mummy" he began, but was cut off 1/2 way through.  
  
A slap across the face does tend to shut one up quite effectively.  
  
"You're bleeding all over MY carpet you HORRIBLE child!" Samantha screeched, and Severus the 2nd reached up to gingerly touch the bruise on his cheek.  
  
A second slap made him cry out.  
  
"SAMANTHA!" Came a harsh call, and the woman stopped herself, just before swatting the child again. She turned to see her husband, standing menacingly over her.  
  
"SMACK!" right across her face, she bit her cheek and began to bleed.  
  
"Never hit a child you psychopathic woman." He hissed slowly, careful to let his words sink in.  
  
"Go, Severus, your mother and I have to talk."  
  
***** End Flash Back *****  
  
He reached up to touch the blue mark on his cheek, and almost groaned in pain as he instantly pulled his hand away.  
  
"Sev? Severus?" A small, childish voice asked as a little girl came running up towards him from behind the broom shed.  
  
"Severus, what's wrong?" the little girl asked, her soft black hair sop and wet, clinging to her face and her large black eyes wide.  
  
"Nothing Sylvani.. Been swimming I see." Severus said, trying to smile, but the way his cheek had swollen made it painful.  
  
"Oh my! What happened Severus?!" The little girl asked, dashing over to her brother and pushing his blocking arm aside before he could say anything.  
  
"I-I just fell, that's all." He lied.  
  
"Well here, I'll give you a kiss to make it better." the girl said with an honest smile across her face, she leaned in and pressed cherry-red lips on the bruise gently, and it didn't hurt.  
  
"There, all better Sev. Now, do you want to come swimming with me? I'm afraid to go too deep on my own.."  
  
"Tell you what Sylvy, I'll watch, I don't feel much like swimming right now."  
  
"Ok, thank you Sevvy!" She giggled, hugging her brother tightly and jogging off.  
  
He stood up slowly, still holding the book entitled, "Defensive Magic- A Guide To Magical Defences Against Beasts and Spells Alike (By Alamandrida Marcoskovskie)". He walked just as slowly towards the lake, where he heard splashing that told him his sister had just dove in.  
  
"Sylvani, remember, not past your waist." Severus said, sitting down at the water's edge and glancing out at his sister, who seemed to be splashing playfully.  
  
Then he heard the ear-splitting scream.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"  
  
"SYLVANI!" He cried, tossing his books aside, unclipping his cloak (so as to avoid being strangled by it as he swam) and diving in, his sweater and jeans growing heavy as he swam as quickly as possible out to his sister.  
  
There, clutching at his little sister's legs and pulling her down into the water, was a Grindylow.  
  
"I'm coming Sylvy!" he cried, diving under and snatching at the beast. He remembered something in the book he had been reading.  
  
"The most effective way to escape the clutches of a Grindylow is to break it's grip." And with that, he tore at the beasts long, slender fingers and growled. However, the curses he spat merely came out as large bubbles as he finally managed to pull his sister free.  
  
"GET TO LAND!" He shouted over his sister's screams.  
  
She went suddenly quiet, and began to swim as quickly as she could towards land, "Hurry Sevvy... I don't want to loose you... I Love you Sevvy..." she whispered to him before she took off.  
  
"I love you too Sylvani, now hurry!" he hissed, feeling the growing presence of Grindylows around him.  
  
"IMOBULOUS!" he cried, and immediately all of the Grindylows stopped moving.  
  
As soon as he reached shore, panting, soaking wet, and nursing his cheek and lip (which had reopened by now), he heard an ear-splitting screech.  
  
"SEVERUS ANDREW SNAPE! WHAT IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS MAGIC ARE YOU DOING?!" Samantha screeched, and he winced.  
  
"Wet! Bleeding all over your robes! ARE YOU MENTAL?!"  
  
"N-n-no mum.. I w-was j-just."  
  
"WHY ARE YOU STUTTERING?!"  
  
"C-c-cold..."  
  
"Bloody right you're cold! And you deserve it too! Jumping into the lake in your ROBES! You're GROUNDED! NO MAGIC FOR A WEEK!"  
  
He looked obediently at his feet...  
  
"MUMMY! He SAVED me, mummy! Grindylows..."  
  
"And what were you doing swimming with Grindylows in the FIRST place? I never said you could go into the lake!"  
  
"B-b-but..."  
  
"NO BUTS! YOU'RE GROUNDED TOO!!!!!!!!"  
  
With that, and a slap across both children's faces, the angry woman stormed off, and Sylvani fell to the ground, crying.  
  
"M-mommy did t-too tell me I c-could g-go sw-swimming..." she sobbed out, clutching her bruising cheek and crying loudly.  
  
"I believe you Sylvani." He said as gently as he could without bursting into fits of tears too. His mother had slapped him three times in the span of an hour, and he felt like the skin on his cheek was on fire.  
  
"D-d'you want me to kiss it better?" Sylvani asked, seeing her brother doing his best not to cry.  
  
"Only if you let me kiss yours better first." He said with a smile, brushing his now wet hair away from his face.  
  
"O-Ok, Sevvy..."  
  
He leaned in and kissed his little sister's cheek gently, and she smiled through her tears.  
  
"All better." He said softly, and his sister returned the action.  
  
"Yes. All better." 


	2. Hogwarts Was Supposed To be Better Prt1

Due to the fact I was stupid and overlooked my Spell Checker (I swear, it was on my 'To Do' list!), I have been sent quite a few e-mails telling me about mistakes I have made in this story. I'd like to take the time to say SORRY, but I don't have time every day to go over my bloody spelling. With that, I also must say thank you to the people who offered to give me a hand, but I am also refusing. If my Spell Checker DOES happen to miss a few things this time, I ask not to be e-mailed about it as I have a busy schedule for the rest of this summer. Thanks, and please enjoy chapter 2 of Why Snape's Such A Cranky Git.  
  
**************  
  
Chapter 2- Hogwarts Was Supposed To Be Better- Part 1, Potions **************  
  
"Yes Mr. Potter?" Came a deep, booming voice from the front of the room. The boy addressed smiled smugly to his friends and then looked back up to the teacher.  
  
"It's known as the draught of living death sir." Mr. Potter said simply, looking positively arrogant as the teacher awarded 10 points to Gryffindor.  
  
The greasy-haired boy at the back of the class finally put down his hand and stared at his cauldron. It had been the first question he had been able to answer all day, and had finally hoped to get some points for Slytherin, but that damned Potter....  
  
"Alright class, just to see how much you have remembered over the summer, I'd like everyone to attempt to conjure a simple sleeping potion from memory, we'll be testing the most promising looking ones on.." The teacher paused and glanced around the classroom at various students who were either slinking in their chair, or trying to hide pets they had brought to class. Unfortunately, Severus Snape wasn't so quick to tuck his snake away, "Mr. Snape's pet snake."  
  
The teacher nodded once at Severus, who sighed but nodded back, why was it always him?  
  
The class went by quickly, some potions fizzing wildly and emitting green sparks that smelled strongly of vomit, others steaming so heavily it looked like a small cloud had appeared within the potions dungeon.  
  
Severus nodded slowly to himself, "One ingredient left..." he muttered, reaching over for a shaker labelled, 'Spine of Lionfish'. He added a pinch to his potion, which immediately caused the turquoise-coloured liquid to turn into an electric shade of orange.  
  
He winced; it was the wrong ingredient! But, it couldn't have been, he remembered the potion perfectly.. A pinch of 'Spine of Lionfish'....  
  
He picked up the shaker and sniffed it slightly, and groaned. It wasn't 'Spine of Lionfish' within it, but obviously powdered Unicorn horn...  
  
"Mr. Snape, I suggest you start to clean your cauldron out before your potion burns through its bottom." The teacher sneered, whisking past and looking down at the orange liquid with a look of disgust upon his visage, "I'd have expected you to know not to use Unicorn horn in this potion..."  
  
Severus nodded slowly, and swished his wand. Immediately the cauldron was empty and he sighed heavily, he was so close, he might have gotten full marks!  
  
He glanced across the classroom, where James Potter sat next to his 3 closest friends; Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew. He grimaced; James' potion was simmering a pale blue, the perfect minor sleeping potion...  
  
"What?" He muttered to himself, staring at Sirius who was holding up a shaker that looked identical to the one that should have held 'Spine of Lionfish' in it...  
  
Sirius Black winked, and Severus immediately looked livid. Sirius had switched his potion ingredients! He let out a low growl, ~ That bloody Potter and his damned friends! ~ He thought angrily, not even realizing that he had just pounded his fist so hard against his table that his cauldron had jumped and slid off of the wooden surface with a loud clang.  
  
"5 points from Slytherin, and I think a detention at 5 o'clock tonight should due Mr. Snape, obviously for disrupting class."  
  
************************ Yes, short chapter, busy, heading out to my Aunt's house soon to visit my little cousin. 


	3. Hogwarts Was Supposed To be Better Prt2

**************  
  
Chapter 2- Hogwarts Was Supposed To Be Better- Part 2, Transfiguration **************  
  
He grimaced as Professor McGonagall handed out the turtles which they would be transfiguring into water goblets this class, he never liked Transfiguration...  
  
"Can anyone tell me the proper incantation for turning an animal into a water goblet?"  
  
Severus sat anxiously at the edge of his chair, his hand raised into the air, and as the teacher scanned over the small pile of students with hands high in the air, she seemed less than impressed.  
  
"Mr. Snape, can you enlighten the class with using the proper incantation?"  
  
His eyes widened slightly he knew the word, but he had never done it properly before. He nodded slowly, perhaps he could get some points back for Slytherin?  
  
He removed his wand from his bag and looked apprehensively down at his turtle.  
  
He tapped hsi wand once, twice, thrice down on the turtle's hard shell, and said as confidently as possible, "Feraverto."  
  
The turtle began to shift and change slightly, until the turtle looked much like a goblet, but was very green and crawled along on four stubby legs at a very slow pace.  
  
"Not quite, Mr. Snape.. Can anybody else demonstrate for the class?"  
  
Severus's heart plummeted into his stomach, where it splashed around weirdly and caused him to want to throw up. He had just made a fool of himself in front of the class!  
  
"Mr. Black?"  
  
He looked over to see James Potter's friend Sirius Black looking just as arrogant as James did in Potions, tapping his wand against the turtle and using the same incantation as himself. Immediately the turtle turned into a sparkling silver water goblet, and Snape groaned.  
  
"10 points for Gryffindor."  
  
~ Why is it always Potter and Black? ~ He wondered to himself as he reversed his spell to use in a second attempt to make his turtle a water goblet. When he completed it the second time, it worked, and he muttered a curse under his breath.  
  
"Never when it matters."  
  
~ Of Course not, Severus, if it worked when it mattered then your life might actually have a bright spot. ~ Came a little nagging voice in the back of hsi head. He looked down at his water goblet and waited for the teacher to come around and check on each students' progress. Meanwhile, he dipped his quill into a pot of crimson ink and began to draw pictures of flying snitches and a badly drawn cartoon of himself catching them with ease.  
  
"Mr. Snape, what are you doing? Why haven't you changed your turtle into a water goblet yet?" Minerva McGonagall asked.  
  
"B-but... I did." Severus said, looking dumstruck up at the teacher, then to where a turtle was making its way lazily across his desk.  
  
"Really, I would have assumed better of your Severus. You will write me a 1 foot long essay on transfiguring animals into water goblets for tomorrow, and you will practice the spell over night."  
  
Severus groaned, but nodded and looked down at his turtle, which ahd almost reached the edge of his table, and he pulled it back, trying not to look over at James Potter and his friends. Why? Because they were the only plausible explanation as to who had transfigured his water goblet back into a turtle.  
  
"Class is dismissed."  
  
"Oi! Snivellus! Enjoy your essay!" Laughed Sirius as he walked on by, James laughing at his side, Remus Lupin hiding his face behind a book, and Peter Pettigrew squeeking merrily along.  
  
Trudging down a set of stairs towards the Slytherin's Dungeon and its safe walls, he looked gloomily towards a set of Slytherin first years, who were chatting to each other. He glared at them and pushed past them, hissing "Out of my way!" as he did so.  
  
He suddenly felt a little better.  
  
"Severus..." Came a gleeful hiss from behind him, and he turned to see Lucius Malfoy looking positively glowing, "Quite fun, isn't it?"  
  
"Isn't what?"  
  
"Pushing around the first years, it's even better when you do it to Gryffindors, or those push-over Hufflepuffs..."  
  
"I suppose." Severus said as they looked towards a statue of some dark- looking wizard holding the head of some creature that Severus had never read about nor seen.  
  
"Parseltongue." Lucius said dully, and the wizard stepped aside to reveal a secret doorway, to which the two walked through.  
  
Within was a beautifully decorated room, black leather couches and armchairs facing an ancient-looking fireplace where a bright red fire was dancing about. On the walls hung many pictures, most depicting famous wizards that had came from Slytherin house, the rest showing the founder of House Slytherin himself.  
  
"Perhaps I will show you some of the joys of being a Slytherin... All of the younger students fear you, and it's smart to use that to your advantage..."  
  
"Perhaps... But right now I have a Transfiguration essay to write." 


End file.
